GLOSSARY OF TERMS

Acquaintance Rape - Any rape where the victim knows the offender.

Age of Consent - The age at which one is legally considered old enough to decide to have consensual sex. Age varies from state to state.

Boundaries - Spaces between people.  Boundaries may be—
 

Physical - when you touch someone without permission, you violate their physical boundary. Going through someone's personal belongings or reading their mail is also a violation of their boundaries. 

Verbal (emotional) - telling someone what you and a sexual partner did last night violates the partner's boundary of privacy. 

Visual - staring at another's body can make that person uncomfortable and therefore violate their boundary.   Because sexual violence is such a serious boundary violation, it impacts the survivor's perception of when or how to set boundaries. Survivors may be unfamiliar with boundaries in general; they may not know that they have a right to create and reinforce them. Many survivors need support developing and practicing boundaries.
 

Grooming - The act of befriending and influencing a child by giving gifts, compliments and special treatment with the sole intent of sexually abusing the child.

Child Molestation - Sexual conduct by an adult with a child.

Consent - To give approval or permission without being coerced, manipulated or threatened to comply. A minor or someone under the influence of alcohol or another controlled substance can not consent; a key issue in the definition sexual abuse; a person does not consent if he/she does not have the ability either to choose or to refuse the sexual activity.
 

To give consent, several conditions must be met—

1. the person giving consent must clearly understand what the activity is all about and have the right to say no or to stop the behavior

2. the parties involved have to be of equal (or near equal) power(age, strength, knowledge and awareness what the behavior means)

3. An adult and child cannot be seen as equal in these terms.

4. NOTE: Even if the child gives permission (guilt, childlike loyalty, fear, physical response) to a sexual behavior, it cannot be truly consentual (giving consent) because there is an inequality of age, power and knowledge.
 

Covert sexual abuse - without the immediate knowledge of the victim; ex. observing another person nude without their consent, videotaping without their consent, people engaged in sexual activity

Date Rape - Any rape where the victim knows the offender in a dating capacity.

Date Rape Drugs - Drugs used to facilitate rape. These drugs are usually slipped into someone's drink without his/her knowledge and the person becomes unconscious after ingesting them. The two most common are Rohypnol (Slang: Roofies) or Ecstasy.

Defense Mechanism - An unconscious way of dealing with difficult situations. (i.e., avoidance, displacement, denial, eating disorders, and repression)

Dysfunctional family - used to express the inability of family members to meet the God-given needs for nurture.  These families are unable to communicate their feelings, both positive and negative, in a consistent and caring way; unable to respond to the needs of each family member. 

Denial - a powerful coping mechanism that protects an individual from the painful truth of being sexually exploited. When we're in denial we lie to ourselves about the truth of what happened and who is responsible. On the road to recovery survivors must confront the truth regarding the abuse and place responsibility where it properly belongs in order for emotional healing to occur.

Domestic Violence - acts of violence or abuse against a person living in one's household.  This is understood to include physical, emotional and sexual abuse.  Domestic violence can be in all kinds of relationships such as married couples and unmarried couples.

Enabler - someone who allows or makes it easier for someone to do what they shouldn't. 

Exploit - to use someone for selfish reason or profit 

Exhibitionism - The act of exposing others to the sight of one's genitalia in a lewd or indecent manner. (Slang: flasher or streaker)

Flashback - a trauma symptom; a memory of a traumatic event  

Incest - Sexual contact between persons who are closely related by blood, marriage or adoption.

Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) - describes physical violence, sexual violence, stalking and psychological aggression (including coercive acts) by a current or former intimate partner.

Minimize - statements to make something seem less important or smaller than it really is; to hide the emotional pain (it's  no big deal, he/she didn't mean anything by it, that hasn't affected my life, etc) 

Multiple Assailant Rape - Rape committed by more than one assailant against a single victim. Usually planned and may involve drugs and/or alcohol. (Slang: gang rape or party rape)

Neglect - failure of a parent or guardian to provide a minor with adequate food, clothing, medical care, protection, supervision and emotional support

Offender/Perpetrator - The person who commits a sexual assault on another person.

Overcomer - To struggle successfully against a difficulty or disadvantage and relying on the sufficiency in Christ.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) - an anxiety disorder caused by a traumatic event, such as combat, a natural disaster or crime (sexual violence), or even a traffic accident. It may affect personal relationships or health.

Rape - Forced sexual intercourse without a person’s consent or permission. Rape is about power and control in order to dominate and humiliate another person.

Repression - a person "unconsciously" pushes painful or difficult memories out of consciousness  

Secondary Victim - A secondary victim is someone who has been impacted by another person's victimization. Secondary victims are often comprised of family members and/or loved ones. When a traumatic event happens to one member of the family, most, if not all, of the family members are traumatized in their own right.

Secrets - "you're only as sick as your secrets" an adage (proverb) used in AA to express a general truth...It basically means that a secret kept in the dark grows and becomes more harmful, but once it is exposed to light or released, its power is lost.

Sex Offender Registry  - An online and/or print registry of sex offenders. Registries are established within states and an offender is usually required to register after they have been convicted and have served their sentence for a sex crime.

Sexual Abuse - any sexual activity (verbal, visual or physical) engaged in without consent, which may be emotionally or physically harmful and which exploits a person in order to meet another person's sexual or emotional needs.

Sexual Abuse Trigger - an emotional or physical reaction to something in the present that is connected to the past abuse.

Sexual Assault - An umbrella term that covers various unlawful sexual activity whether it is verbal, by physical force, or coercion. (i.e., child molestation, multiple assailant rape, incest, spousal rape, date rape, stranger rape, statutory rape, acquaintance rape, and sexual harassment)

Sexual Harassment - Uninvited and unwelcomed verbal or physical behavior of a sexual nature especially by a person in authority toward a subordinate (as an employee or student).

Spousal Rape - A non-consensual sexual assault in which the perpetrator is the victim's spouse. Also referred to as marital rape.

Statutory Rape - Sexual intercourse between an adult and anyone who is below the age of consent, whether or not it is consensual.

Stranger Rape -  The victim/survivor and perpetrator/assailant do not know each other.

Suppression  - a conscious pushing down of painful memories 

Survivor -  A person who was victimized by sexual assault, sexual abuse, child abuse,or domestic violence, who is coping/healing from the long-term effects of the trauma suffered. The term "survivor" is often used instead of the term "victim" in order to reclaim power.

Thriver - someone who goes through a threatening life event but shows subsequent growth in spite of the experience. 

Trauma  - an extremely distressing experience that causes severe emotional shock and may have long-lasting psychological effects; anything that overwhelms the brain's ability to cope 

Victim -  A term for someone who has been through an assault or abuse experience; a person destroyed by, or suffering grievous injury from another.

Victim Mentality -  A mindset in which a person who was once a victim continues in old thought patterns of feeling powerless, even when the victimization has ended.

Voyeurism - Looking at someone in an inappropriate or lewd manner without their knowledge. (Slang: peeping tom)